How to Detox Your Kids From Screens

We are all guilty. We start out high and mighty, “We don’t want plastic toys, only wooden,” and before long, we are tossing any piece of trash in front of our kids for a moments peace and the preservation of our sanity. Before long, you look around and your kids are well on their way to becoming tech-heads; their imagination is withering, they fight more, they are more entitled, and you just keep sitting them in front of the screen to try to end the chaos.

** This post contains Amazon affiliate links. I will receive a small percentage of the sale if you purchase through this link. It will be no additional cost to you.

If you are reading this, then you obviously want to reduce the technology in your home. Maybe you read an article where pediatricians were against technology that inspired you, you read this book, or, like me, your own observations told you that maybe all these screens aren’t such a good thing. It’s ok, it’s not too late to make a change. I know because I did. First, let’s take a moment to take some ownership.

Parents are the worst at screens. We are the ABSOLUTE WORST. Kids learn their most important life lessons through example. They also notice what in your life is getting the most attention. Unfortunately, our object of affection is usually our phones. I don’t know about you, but this realization absolutely grieved me. I knew that the change would have to start with my husband and with me.

Since I home-school, we don’t need technology for school. However, summer and spring break from public school are the perfect time to clean things up. You don’t need technology during school breaks such as summer break and holiday breaks, so if you’re ready to make a change, prepare yourself and make a plan for when the kids will be home from school for a while.

Here is what has worked for my family in prying the screen out from in front of their little eyes (and ours too):

1. Have an honest conversation

This one seems so simple, doesn’t it? The truth is, we underestimate what our kids can truly understand. Most kids want what is best for them, they just don’t know how to make the best choices. That’s why kids always respond well to boundaries and consistency. Even though it is hard, it works when you have structure and don’t give in.

The night after I had some major parenting convictions about TV, I told my three kids that we needed to make a change. I told them that I was on my phone too much. Then I said I was sorry that I didn’t give them my full attention, or if they ever felt like I valued the phone over them. I went on to say that as a family we watch way too much TV, and that there are more fun things we could be doing.

During our conversation, I threw out the idea that I needed to make a “tech box” to put my phone in during the day to avoid distractions. Then, in true fashion, I kinda forgot about it all. Oh, but they didn’t. They remembered that tech box and how I didn’t want to prioritize my phone over them! This told me that my kids do care about the time I spend distracted on my phone. The next day, they used the items available to them and created a tech box with their little hands:

After this, they started reminding me all the time. They had my permission to remove the phone from me and put it in the box. Boy did they! It was all very fun… not. I didn’t realize it at the time, but this was setting the groundwork for my kids accepting less technology in their lives.

2. Limit Your Own Technology Usage

I am telling you that it is so much harder to be the change, than to force your kids to change. By making my kids aware of the problem and my desire to change, they became my little accountability partners. The kids helped pry the phone out of my unwilling hands. They learned from taking my phone away, and freeing up my attention, that we were having more fun and we weren’t even doing anything special. However, we were fully aware of each other. I was a different person, a better person, a more attentive mom, and they saw that change.

3. Take it all away.

A week or so after we had our initial conversation, and I had been obeying my own phone rules, I took away the TV. Taking screens completely away all at once, in hindsight, was the best way this could have gone down. It’s so much easier to just rip the band-aid off. However, it would be much harder to just take all the screens away with no previous explanation or without setting an expectation in your own life.

The night before you take the screens away, explain to the kids that in the morning things will be different. The screens will be gone. Don’t tell them it will be hard at first because they might not struggle at all. If they do struggle on day one, when you put them in bed, tell them again how the screens will be gone in the morning and that you understand it is hard, but it will get easier.

It’s actually pretty simple, but you must be tough and stick to your guns. I would say “slowly but surely you will get there” but it wasn’t slow at all. By the third day, the kids were completely used to not having TV. They entertained themselves for hours. Every once in a while I’d throw them a bone by planning a special activity, but for the most part, I left them to use their imaginations and to play with one another.

In less than a week, we went from too much TV to kids no longer even asking for TV.

This is how quickly children can change when they are young. My kids are 8, 5, and 3. The sooner you regain control of the screens in their lives, the easier it will be, but if your kids are older, all hope is not lost. It can still be done, but you have to stand your ground. It might take a month or more, but it’s worth it.

What Our Life is Like One Month Later…

It’s been a while since we said no to screens and when my kids get out of bed, they play. They ask to go outside and stay out there for hours. I have also noticed an unexpected side effect of this new lifestyle: less fighting. We went an entire weekend without constant bickering, and I have to believe it’s because they are using their minds and getting all their energy out during the day!

Since it’s been a while, we have been bringing movie nights back in, but only when we feel like it; not even once a week. My kids don’t ask about movie night, and I don’t think about it. It is nice to be free from it all and have T.V. be something special we do as a family instead of something I use to pacify my kids.

My method for taking away technology has no real scientific basis other than seeing the effects of it on myself and my children. Although there have been plenty of studies that explore the effects of technology on developing minds, until you witness it with your own eyes you will still be skeptical to make the change. I hope that this post helps you see how easy it can be to regain the technology use in your home.

Have you successfully broken the reign of technology in your home? How did you do it and how did your children handle the change? Comment below!