12 Week Self-Imposed Vegan Challenge: Week 2 Day 3
Today started off with me feeling on top of the world. I had a great meal last night, I took this progress photo, said some inspirational stuff… I even started feeling like I was experiencing a perk of being vegan – less sweat! “This vegan thing, I’ve got this!” I said to myself.
Oh how the day took a mental turn for the worse.
Here’s what happened:
It started when I discovered the almond milk I had slaved to make last week had gone bad. I realized this only after I mixed it into the soup I had cooked all day. Chalking it up to the fact that I drink kombucha, I shrugged it off and ate the soup anyway. (the rest of the milk was poured down the drain, and I felt anger simmering inside me.)
The soup was vegan. I don’t know how to say it any other way. Maybe in a month or two it’ll be a creamy treat, but I just sat there mumbling to my friend the entire bowl. Things like “You know what would make this soup extra creamy? cream.” “Cheese would be good.” “Bacon. Need I say more?” It was rough and I felt the same familiar sorrow that had plagued me this entire journey.
The dinner last night had left me so enthralled with veganism, that I decided to consider that soup a snack, and make that pad Thai from last night again. So I did, and I ate it, and I’m still sad. Like, how many times can I eat pad Thai and be happy? Can this dish last me for 10 weeks? Look how quickly I slip from hope to the depths of despair? It’s always about food. I have a problem.
Here are my thoughts for the day:
Here’s what I ate:
Breakfast: (16 points)
2 banana muffins. (16 points) The first one I ate for hunger, the second one for pure pleasure. No regrets. Black coffee and lots of water.
Lunch: (6 points)
2 servings of The Best Ever Kale Salad. I will make this salad again because it was easy and delicious.
Afternoon Snack: (3 points)
Green smoothie (0 pts): 4 cups of spinach, 1 bag frozen mango, frozen banana, and water. I split it 4 ways with the kids.
Creamy Slow Cooker Potato and Corn Chowder (3 pts). I would have been close to my daily points had this soup satisfied me. It’s me though, I don’t stop until I am satisfied.
Dinner: (23 points)
2 servings Pad Thai Sauce (4 pts), 2.5 cups cooked Rice Noodles (14 pts) 1/4 cup salted peanuts (5 pts) This combo of veggies (0 pts). This dish is by far the wind beneath my shaky vegan wings. It’s good stuff, and you will probably see a lot of it on my meal run down over the next 10 weeks. That is until the very sight of it makes me want to vomit. I’m complicated like that.
After Dinner Frustration Binge: (33 pts…hahaha!)
3.5 ounces of sea salt caramel nuts: (22 pts)
1/2 sea salt almond dark chocolate bar (11 pts)
I am pleased to report I am 32 points in the hole. Do you relate? Dieting is not for the faint of heart.
Here is my exercise log:
Walking (20 min): 1 pt
Steps (7000): 5 pts
Abdominal Training (20 min):2 pts
Stretching (15 min): 1 pt
Weight lifting (15 min): 3 pts
Stationary bicycling (hard 15 min): 5 pts
Stationary bicycling (easy 15 min): 1 pt
Total activity earned: 18 pts
Exercise is like a part time job to me. haha! I love it, however it makes me hungry. Again, don’t freak out that you will be starving if you do WW whole-food plant based and don’t exercise as much as me. You won’t be as hungry if you aren’t working out as often, and it’ll all even out.
So I had an out of control moment. It happens. I literally feel nothing about it. Nothing, and this is why I keep losing despite all my failings. There is no more shame or guilt. It is what it is. Let’s move on.
Another day down. Gonna keep on, keepin on. What choice do I have? Make this big proclamation, go to all this work, and quit? I can’t let those kind, new vegan friends of mine down. I must keep on.
